Decorating Jack's tree

 

Here's our little family...you can't quite see us all because one decided to become invisible!  STINKER!!

Here's Jack's tree

Here's all the helpers

Here's our little Toad...I tell ya, if they aren't missing a sock...it's a GLOVE!

I LOVE this picture of Jades and Poppy

Every year about a week before Christmas both sides of our family (whoever can come) come out to the cemetery and decorate Jack's little tree.  It was pretty cold...like usual so we don't tend to stay too long.  We decorate quickly and then sing a Christmas song.  This year I wanted to opt out of singing "Silent Night".  It used to be one of my favorites, but I just can't bare the part that says, "...infant so tender and mild....sleep in heavenly peace...sleep in heavenly peace."  I know the song is definitely NOT talking about our Jack, but the song really touches my heart and then the water works start and then I can't turn them off.  And in this weather I'm afraid the tears would freeze right to my face!  

Every time we go to the cemetery (a place NO PARENT should EVER have to visit at Christmas time) I always look for a little grave near Jack's.  She was a little girl who lived almost to the day as long as Jack.  I often wonder why she's there, was there an accident, was she sick for a long time?  Sometimes I like to think that Jack knows her and when they "wake" up they'll find each other and fall in love.  I know....I'm living in a dream world!  :)  I'm a loon, what can I say?!  Sometimes it's just nice to dream I guess...anything is better than the reality that he's only with us in spirit!  And "in spirit" just doesn't fit bill when it's Christmas and you want all three of your little boys to open their presents and see the excitement on the faces of ALL THREE LITTLE BOYS.  Someday I'll have that...just not today. And in the words of my sweet Mother in law..."Everything will be okay in a few years."  All I want to know is....how long is a few years?!  :)