Mommy and Jaden time

I sure do love this little boy of mine!  I feel so large lately!  I feel like I don't have much room to even fit into our recliner.  But, today Jaden crawled up on my lap and snuggled with me until we both fell asleep.  I have to admit...I don't want this to change.  He can be a handful, but he's my little buddy!  We go everywhere together.  He's my little friend.  We spend so much time that the thought of having this new little one makes me a little sad.  Not sad because I don't want another one, but sad because it means that my one on one time with Jaden will be different.  I'm sure going to miss this.  I don't like change and I'm nervous that this sweet little boy will feel like he's lost in the shuffle once baby number 4 arrives.  I hope this isn't the case.  But for now, I want to remember this feeling today.  I love this little boy so much and feel so blessed to have had so much one on one time with him these past few years.  I remember being pregnant with Jack and being worried that I wouldn't be able to love Jack as much as loved Corbin.  I worried that my heart wouldn't be large enough to love them equally.  I even BEGGED the Lord to let me love this new baby (Jack) as much as I loved Corbin.  I couldn't understand, but as soon as Jack was born (maybe 4 days after) I grew so absolutely IN LOVE with Jack that I wondered how I could have ever lived without him.  (In hind sight...I still don't know how I'm living without him)  I love my boys!  I love them all the same, and all completely different too.