Happy Mother's Day

Who's the luckiest mom....THIS GIRL!!!

I am certainly lucky to have such awesome little boys (and Coby) that make me feel SO darn special!  

Today they let me sleep in, then brought me breakfast in bed...scrambled eggs with cheese and bacon with a glass of OJ.  Then they gave me a really pretty necklace and earrings too.  All day long I was able to be lazy, play on the computer and not have to worry about ANYTHING!  Coby took care of all the diaper changing, kids fighting, and overall fort maintaining!  Thanks sweetie!  I love being a mom...most days...and I owe it all to you!  Thanks for choosing ME to be the mommy to such cute boys!  I hope that one day we'll see what a little girl will look like....not NOW of course...but maybe in a few years!  :)  I'm one lucky lucky gal!  Love you baby!

Today was actually really great...until I read a sweet email from a darling girl in my new ward.  She sent me the nicest note telling me that she was sure that Jack was close that that he was proud of the example I was setting.  It was like I hit a brick wall.  All the sudden I realized what...or WHO was missing.  I felt like I couldn't breathe.  I quickly and quietly walked upstairs and went straight for my closet.  And then I sobbed.  I sobbed because I missed this little boy.  I sobbed because he's not here.  I sobbed because I know that he is "doing a great work" as he tells me and that he's busy being a missionary.  I wish he was like other missionaries that get to come back to their mothers and fathers after 2 years.  I wished that like most missionaries I got my Mother's Day phone call.  My heart is broken.  It will always be.  And even though I am VERY good at hiding it most days, I can let it all out in my closet.  It was then that I felt an all too familiar voice telling me that he loved me.  He said he was sorry he couldn't be there celebrating with this brothers, but that he was doing a great work!  He said that Poppy was working along side him and that they didn't waste much time putting him to work.  He told me not to be sad and that he was always close and would be there any time I needed him.  After that I felt a little better.  What a blessing the gospel of Jesus Christ is!  I know that I'll be with Jack again.  I know that he IS doing a great work and I hope he knows just how proud his momma is that he was chosen to do so!  One day all of this will make sense and I'll be happy that he was chosen.  But until that day comes....I'll just have to hold on to that hope.