Happy Birthday Jackie Joo

Happy Birthday baby boy! We miss you so much. We feel you near even though we can't see you we know that you are never far from our hearts. How grateful we are for the promise of the Temple Covenants we made and that we are not just a family, we are an ETERNAL family. You have touched so many people in the short time you were able live on the Earth. There isn't anything I wouldn't give to have getting into mischief, following Corbin around, giving us sweet hugs and slobbery kisses and laughing while throwing your head back. You are so amazing and we long for the day that you will return to us. We know we'll see you again and we cling to that promise.

This year for Jack's 2nd birthday we had a little Memorial birthday party at the Cemetery. We were surrounded by family and friends and sent blue balloons up to Heaven.

This year for Jack's birthday we thought it would be nice to extend the challenge to everyone that knew Jack, knew of Jack or anyone that just reads our blog to do some random act of kindness for someone. This can be anything from smiling at someone, giving a compliment or even reading an extra story to your children. You don't have to tell anyone what you have done, but just leave us a comment letting us know that you participated. Maybe by helping someone feel a little more special Jack can touch a few more people.

Happy Birthday Little and Poppy

Happy Birthday Little...aka Lanae. Lanae is my cute cousin. We have close since before we could talk. We used to spend 2 weeks each summer at each other's houses for as long as I can remember. We've always been close. Lanae is one of the most genuine, loving, giving, creative, thoughtful, completely amazing, funny and GORGEOUS people I've ever had the privilege of knowing. She was responsible for writing the beautiful poem for Jack. She came by daily during our hardest time this year to show us that she was thinking of us. Sometimes we'd talk and other times she'd just be there so I didn't have to feel all alone. Our boys LOVE to play together and we seem to have the recipe for making boys! We seem to have our babies around the same time. It's so fun! I love this girl. I'm so happy we're family and that we're so close. SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY you HOT momma! I love you!

Happy Birthday Poppy! We love you! Corbin is in LOVE! He always looks forward to spending time with his "poppy". If he knows Poppy is coming over, he insists on waiting on the steps of the front porch. These two certainly have a GREAT bond and we are so grateful that we live so close for you both to always be buddies. We love you!

2 White Roses

Two white roses, that's what I picked up tonight for Jack's grave. There is symbolism in these two white roses. First they are white, a symbol of purity. Jack is pure. Second, they are delicate. Jack was delicate, highly sensitive to his surroundings. Third, these roses are tender. Jack was very tender hearted. And lastly, I put them in water to help prolong their life, but it's only a matter of time before they will wilt and die. They will never fully reach their full potential because they were cut before they had the opportunity to do so. Jack was cut short before he had the chance to reach his full potential too.

We're having a little birthday memorial for him tomorrow. He should be turning 2 on Wednesday. We should be having a party with candles and cake and presents. But this birthday will be different. Instead of getting balloons to celebrate, we'll be getting balloons to release up to heaven. Instead of cleaning up the cake that Jack would have spilled all over the table and kitchen floor, we'll be eating paperless cupcakes that will fall on the ground of the cemetery near his grave. Instead of taking pictures so we will remember and have a record of his 2nd birthday, we'll be taking pictures of his name plate and the blue balloons on their way up to heaven. Jack won't be in the pictures. He won't be there blow out the candles on his cake. He won't be there to open his presents because this year there won't be any to give.

Tonight I'm sad. Tonight I miss our baby. Our beautiful baby boy. The one who would throw his head back and laugh like his aunt Marse. The one who'd watch his older brother and try his best to keep up. The one who'd run to Coby when he came home from work. The one who was just learning to say "Mama". Why did it have to be him? Why Jack? He was so perfect, so little and so amazing. Why couldn't it have happened to the mother so addicted to drugs that she'd do anything to keep up her high? Or the child so badly neglected and abused that death probably sounds like heaven?

I'm not trying to have a pity party, I'm not. I just want to hold him close tonight. I want to look into his big blue eyes and nibble on his chubby little cheeks until he laughs so hard he has to can hardly breath. I want put him in my Moby and take Corbin and Jasmine on a walk. I want to pull his blond little toe head into my theigh and feel the warmth of his tiny body. I want him to pick me yellow dandelions and feel proud of himself. I want to hear him say the words, "I love you Mom and Dad."

I know I'll have all those wishes someday. So I just have to remind myself that he is where he is supposed to be. Doing the work for our family that could only be done on the other side of the veil by someone so valiant and noble. I know he lives and that we'll see him again. I know that we'll hold him again and we are sealed together as an eternal family. I know that he is doing all he can to secure our place up there.

I miss him. I love him. Someday everything will be okay. Someday.

Do I dare?

What do you think? Do I need a change? Is it time? I'm about 7 weeks from delivering a little monkey and wondered if I should mix things up a bit? I haven't cut my hair this short since High School and I regretted it every single day. GRANTED I did go to Fantastic Sams my senior year BEFORE graduation pictures. I love long hair, but I keep seeing so many cute girls taking the plunge. I still have to run it by Coby...but who knows....

Mexico baby

Okay, so I know it's been almost a month since we got back from Mexico and have YET to post about this amazing trip...but hey better late than never right?!!

In April of this year we were so fortunate to take a trip with a couple of our best friends, Wes and Mandy. We were able to get in so many things and have so much fun that time seemed to absolutely FLY!

Isn't this a totally cute picture of Wes and Mandy?!! I love it! Wes doesn't look AS thrilled, but we all knew he was loving getting a little smooch from the love of his life!

Check out that arm!!

Wes was READY though and hit the ball with complete confidence!

There were even monkeys at the resort and I could be wrong but I think one may have even "showered" Mandy with his affection as she was walking by!

Here's a cute picture of Mandy and I getting dessert...Fried Ice Cream. It was so yummy that I think we made reservations there 3 separate times! Mandy and I had to work our MAGIC one night and convince the hostess to slip us a little ice cream on the side! :) I think I showed a little cleavage, Mandy may have shown a little leg...but when all was said and done...we got our hard earned fried ice cream! YUMMO!

Two TRULY goofy girls!

Coby and Mandy started playing around with the camera at night and were able to capture all of these awesome shots...see below.

Can you believe that this is taken at night? It totally looks like it's the middle of the day...but check out the full moon! Cool huh!

Who could resist kissing in the dark??!!

There's a cute shot of Mandy and I standing on top of these enormous sand bags. Apparently, the beach is eroding pretty quickly. They have those sand bags up and down the beach as far as the eye can see.

Coby tried to catch us mid jump...it didn't quite work out.

READY...

SET...

GO!!!.....
Mandy's a little more graceful!

On Saturday we took a van to Tulum. Cob and I have been there before, but it was so fun to be able to be with Wes and Mandy. We were able to have a mormon tour guide...Moroni pronounced "Moroney". It WAS AWESOME!!! He told us so many amazing things. One of which was that the Mayans created a calender that has been accurate up to our day and that the last day they have recorded ends on December 21, 2012. 2012? PLEASE let them be accurate! If I only have to wait 3 more years to see my sweet little monkey...I think I could honestly be the definition of ECSTATIC!!! Ecstatic....I don't even think that could accurately describe how happy I'd be!

This was a wall that was built around the entire city. Inside the city was the temple and only a handful of special people were allowed to live inside, mostly royalty those responsible for working in the temple. He told us that if we were to look closely at some of the rocks, we could see imprints of sea animals because it had been under water for so long. He told us that the Lord didn't want the city to be found until the Book of Mormon had been around for a time. 12 years after the book of mormon was translated the city of Tulum was suddenly discovered. It was no longer under water. The explorers found many evidences proving the truthfulness of the Book of Mormon.

Moroni was showing us that many ships came to this island to find treasure, but because of the reef, most of them crashed and became shipwrecked. He was showing us that the Temple was positioned in such a way as to be a light to those trying to enter in. There is only one narrow opening along the reef.

Our little photographer!!

I love the red seven fingered hands. He showed us that when Christ visited the Americas, he choose his disciples and gave them the priesthood by the laying on of hands. If you've ever seen this done and you're mormon you'll notice that the hands in the circle cross over each other looking like 7 fingers. Neat huh?!

Moroni told us the steps that lead into the temple were built very steep and that the doorways were built very small. This was to show reverence. The people used to go up and down the stairs from side to side in a zig zag fashion. When entering they would have to bow in order to get inside. In the picture taken, it shows an upside down engraving of an upside down man. This is to represent Christ, the "descending" God. Inside the temple there is a lookout where light shines through perfectly. It shines on the sping and fall equinox and on April 6th. April 6th you ask? Well, that day has a lot of meaning to us. We believe that it's Christ's birthday, Christ's resurection and the church was officially organized on that day. I know he told us of more, but I can't remember right now.

Here's a shot of Coby and I just outside of the city walls. The Mayans did offer sacrifices. The righteous Nephites offered animal sacrifices, until Christ came and sacrifices were no longer necessary. However, the Lamanites offered up human sacrifices. They were usually women and children. In the Book of Mormon, the Lamanites kidnapped many of women and children of the Nephites. In the Chitzinitza ruins, scientist have found many skeletons of women and children.

After the tour, we couldn't help ourselves but go down and play on the beach for a few. It was so gorgeous!!

Then it was back to the resort. I took pictures and Cob, Wes and Mandy threw the ball around.

Check out that throw!!

And that catch....! NFL...look out, we may have found the hottest, NFL player around! :)

I love this shot of Wes. Mandy certainly has an eye! :)

Just a night another night out with my cute hubby! Isn't he sooo cute??!!!

Look how happy they are!! Soooo in love! :)

Sunday we decided to go to church. It was fast and testimony that week. I thought I'd finally be able to get up and bare my testimony freely to people I didn't know. But there was a line the ENTIRE time. There is usually an awkward silence during most of the fast and testimony meetings I've attended, but these people couldn't wait to get up and bare theirs. What amazing and humble people we were able to see that beautiful Easter Morning. I felt Jack there.

Wes and Mandy got the hang of bartering pretty quickly! It was fun to watch them going back and forth!

Coby showing off his mad skills jumping off a big rock!

I think Coby was trying to get Wes to pose in this one!

The next day we went snorkeling in a cynote. It was fresh water and was a nice change from the salt water. We got to see really cool fish and under the water it was so peaceful and looked like this underground green mossy world. It was breathtaking. I know Mandy was wishing her camera was waterproof. While we were there there was another couple there swimming and having their lunch. After they were in the water we noticed a little duck eating what looked like a tortilla. I thought it was a little odd, but didn't give it too much thought. Until I watch that duck go right into their bag and pull another tortilla out and started munching. That little duck was a little theif...and a piglet! :) It was really funny!

Here's Coby doing a back dive into the water!

Mandy also took the brave plunge! So did Wes, but I don't have any pictures of him...I think I took them with Mandy's camera.

After snorkeling for a bit, we found this really cool cave. Mandy found a cross in there and then the mosquitos found US! So we didn't stick around too much longer.

So we finished up our "business" and headed back home.

Although most of the days were "red" days...we had an absolute blast. On the last day before we left the waves were so strong that they pulled Wes and I into the water. It literally sucked us in. The waves had created this sort of sink hole. It was pretty scary. The was were so strong that they would knock me down just when I caught my breath, another wave would be back to bring me down again. I didn't stay in very long that day. But it sure was fun. All I could think about was how much my dad would ahve LOVED these waves! :)

Look at that stud of a husband I have!!?? I tried my best to talk him OUT of bringing that awful thing! But to no avail and to some gooding hiding spots, the speedo ended up making the journey! Don't be suprised if you don't ever find it again sweetheart! :) Not that I would have anything to do with it's disappearance....but if it happened to get lost....

This was how Mandy and I loved to spend our days. Lounging and chatting! And then we'd talk some more...did I mention that we NEVER ran out of things to say??!!

This was our last day there. :(

One last kiss!

We had such a blast. At first I was a little reluctant about going to Mexico considering that I'd be 7 months PREGNANT! I can honestly say that I've never had so many people come and touch my belly! :)

I am so happy that we got to get to know the Archibalds better. We had so much fun and look forward to many more trips! :) Lanae, Camille, Bettie, Whit and Amay you better be on board next time!!! :)