Me and my "Bred Bred" aka Ryan
A few "weeks" ago my best friend Ryan flew in for a visit all the way from cold cold Michigan. Where do I begin to talk about Ryan...my little Breddy McBred Bred?!! I LOVE this girl! We have been friends since the 10th grade. That's a LONG time! We've figured that we've been friends for MORE than half our lifetimes. She has always been there for me. She's one of the hardest workers I know. She gives her whole heart and soul into anything and everything she does. She's so talented and kind and generous. She's had some hard times, but you'd never know, because she's constantly putting everyone else first instead of herself. When Jack passed away, she dropped everything and flew out here without even so much of a hesitation. She's stuck with me through thick and thin. We've laughed so hard we've cried! Especially when she dances in the car! That's one I wish I had the camera for! I keep trying to convince her that she should just join the church and marry a cute little mormon boy. I love that she still sends Coby "Napolian Dynamite" stuff for every birthday and christmas. She cracks me up!One of the things I love most about her is that I can totally be myself with her and always have. She's like one of my sisters. I love you Bred...wish we lived closer.
Super Bowl Sunday
Can you tell which team we voted for?!! Some may say that I sold out my home team of the Saints. I say I HATE football, so it didn't really matter! But it's always fun to have a party! Even if it's centered all around Football. It was really fun to see Corbin get into with his hero...his daddy! Even Jadesy got in on the action with a little Colts Jersey. Wish Jack were there to get a Jersey...maybe he could have had whoever the Colt's defensive lineman...aka the "big guy". It's times like these that my heart aches so much to have him near. Not for me...but for Coby's sake and for the sake of his brothers. How fun it would be to have all 4 of my boys hanging out, just being boys. The millennium can't come soon enough. I often wonder just how much of a role he still plays in our lives. I'm sure it's quite a bit...definitely more than we think. Sometimes I just wish I had some sort of time line or date as to when I'll get to see him again. A goal...a finish line to look forward to. I'm running a 1/2 marathon in a few weeks. I've been training for months. It's been hard, but I know that as soon as I cross the finish line all the hard work I've put into it will all be worth it. That's kind of how I feel about seeing Jack again. I am so willing to give my ALL...to work HARD for that amazing moment when we can both see each other across the "finish" line. Ughhhh..... how long is this race???!!! I want to quit. I'm so tired. I miss him so much. I hate that he's gone. I know it's stupid to ask "why"...it won't change anything. It won't bring any sort of peace. But why do some get the miracles they so desperately seek and continue onto their happily ever after? And others just aren't given that opportunity? One day I'm sure it will all make sense. But right now, tonight...I'm missing my beautiful, happy little toe head.
A few "weeks" ago my best friend Ryan flew in for a visit all the way from cold cold Michigan. Where do I begin to talk about Ryan...my little Breddy McBred Bred?!! I LOVE this girl! We have been friends since the 10th grade. That's a LONG time! We've figured that we've been friends for MORE than half our lifetimes. She has always been there for me. She's one of the hardest workers I know. She gives her whole heart and soul into anything and everything she does. She's so talented and kind and generous. She's had some hard times, but you'd never know, because she's constantly putting everyone else first instead of herself. When Jack passed away, she dropped everything and flew out here without even so much of a hesitation. She's stuck with me through thick and thin. We've laughed so hard we've cried! Especially when she dances in the car! That's one I wish I had the camera for! I keep trying to convince her that she should just join the church and marry a cute little mormon boy. I love that she still sends Coby "Napolian Dynamite" stuff for every birthday and christmas. She cracks me up!One of the things I love most about her is that I can totally be myself with her and always have. She's like one of my sisters. I love you Bred...wish we lived closer.
Super Bowl Sunday
Can you tell which team we voted for?!! Some may say that I sold out my home team of the Saints. I say I HATE football, so it didn't really matter! But it's always fun to have a party! Even if it's centered all around Football. It was really fun to see Corbin get into with his hero...his daddy! Even Jadesy got in on the action with a little Colts Jersey. Wish Jack were there to get a Jersey...maybe he could have had whoever the Colt's defensive lineman...aka the "big guy". It's times like these that my heart aches so much to have him near. Not for me...but for Coby's sake and for the sake of his brothers. How fun it would be to have all 4 of my boys hanging out, just being boys. The millennium can't come soon enough. I often wonder just how much of a role he still plays in our lives. I'm sure it's quite a bit...definitely more than we think. Sometimes I just wish I had some sort of time line or date as to when I'll get to see him again. A goal...a finish line to look forward to. I'm running a 1/2 marathon in a few weeks. I've been training for months. It's been hard, but I know that as soon as I cross the finish line all the hard work I've put into it will all be worth it. That's kind of how I feel about seeing Jack again. I am so willing to give my ALL...to work HARD for that amazing moment when we can both see each other across the "finish" line. Ughhhh..... how long is this race???!!! I want to quit. I'm so tired. I miss him so much. I hate that he's gone. I know it's stupid to ask "why"...it won't change anything. It won't bring any sort of peace. But why do some get the miracles they so desperately seek and continue onto their happily ever after? And others just aren't given that opportunity? One day I'm sure it will all make sense. But right now, tonight...I'm missing my beautiful, happy little toe head.
9 comments:
I bet you miss him . . . and I imagine he misses you. You're going to be awesome across both finish lines.
Hugs, love you guys! We are all looking forward to the finish line for one reason or another.
Jack is near. I know you know it. I'm sorry you are missing him so. He was so beautiful, so chubby and easy. I know he misses you. Good luck in the half. You are amazing.
PS We bought those P90X so don't send them! (I'm on day 0...sad, I know)
PSS Is that a thrift town plastic bag in the background????? I miss!
I'm proud of you for so many reasons. I love how you see the good in all things. I love you girl!!!
BTW: can we play tomorrow? Wheeler Farms???
I talked about the finish line in my RS talk a few weeks ago...We labeled it the BIG HAPPY bigger than Disneyland Bigger than anything we could possibly imagine. So BIG and So Happy that we said heck ya we would do this...crazy!!! I know you miss him and this part just sucks, just remember he chose you and you chose him because I believe you were thrilled beyond measure to have that valiant spirit as part of your eternal family. Remember when you look at those that you think are living their happily ever after, you have something, they don't. You have Jack.
Love your buns!
Mel
1 - FINALLY, you gave me a new blog to read!
2 - I love you!
3 - I can't wait to cross the finish line with you! I like to think that Jack will be with us the last bit of the race....because I will be making pick up speed then sprint the last stretch! I think that you are gonna need Jackie! He will be right next to you with a bag of fruit snacks! (he prefers fruit snacks to gu)
The things that we have to work the hardest for; are the most rewarding. You are such a strong, beautiful woman. I miss you, I hope to get back to the gym in the next week or two. Until then many hugs and best of luck on your 1/2 marathon. That is so awesome.
awe:) You were right...that blog about us did make me cry! I have been really missing you alot. I think about my trip out to see you guys often and it always brings a smile to my face. I cannot wait until I get to come out again! I had soooo much fun with Corbin-he is such an amazing little boy-and he is totally like you! LOL and Jaden-lets not forget to mention all the times he puked on me. LOL I just love how much he loves Corbin-he watches his every move and I so enjoyed that laugh of his! So contagious! And I compeltely felt the presense of Jack there-It was such a comforting feeling:) I love you Tiff-You have always been a sister to me and I will love you FOREVER:)
Good Luck on your half!!! I did mine in Nov, but our next one is June. I don't think I'll be running it 7 mths preggo though. Was thinking about Jack the other day. Miss you tons and just wanted to say hang in there. I can't understand how hard it is, but I do know you're finish line is coming. You can make it!!!!!
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