Jack always looked soooo great in blue!
Jack's tree
Coby coming to the rescue with his trusty drill!
Corbin wanted to play with other people's decorations...thank goodness my mom was pay attention!
Some of the work crew.
Here's what the final tree looked like. Coby and I couldn't have been happier! It was beautiful!
This year Coby's mom put together and organized a tree for Jackie to be displayed at the Festival of Trees. Until this year, I really had no idea what the "festival of trees" was. I actually thought it was a bunch of lit up trees at Thankgiving Point. We decided on a theme..."Through the eyes of love." And went with the colors of bronzes to silvers with accents of this gorgeous teal color to go with Jackie's eyes. We wanted to put things on the tree that represented things loved by our Jackie. He LOVED and I MEAN LOVED playing with balls of sorts. We thought about putting little plungers on it, but they were too hard to come by...and honestly...who really wants to boast about their child having a love for playing in a germ invested toilet??!! Joanne and the queen of crafts and cooking really, cute Amber Sargent found wooden basketballs, baseballs, soccer balls and all the Rich, Patterson and Burton (my side) along with my cute Camille came and helped paint the balls, reindeer, snowflakes, hearts and bronze stars. My aunt Linda sent some beautiful garland with Jack's name and 3 teal snowflakes. Our cute neighbor Aprill gave us two stunning ornaments to be placed on the tree. My sweet friend Amy all the way in WA helped out too. A few of the cute girls in our ward gave us a cash donation to help in the ornaments for the tree. Then Coby's family kindly purchased the tree for Coby and I to keep.
While we were there, I couldn't help but be overwhelmed with the amount of love I felt at the Festival of Trees. I watched people as they looked at our tree and read Jack's story and saw how their hearts would just break as they looked at his big blue eyes and beautiful little angelic face. I heard one lady say..."Oh, that little guy was a cutie...oh, it's just so sad...." I lost it and had to walk away because I thought...he was a little cutie...a little cutie who should still be here. I know deep down that he really shouldn't though. Then of course I go on to look at all of the other "children's" trees and read their stories. I came across one that especially broke my heart. A little girl died on her 7 month birthday....but that wasn't the saddest part...hard as that may sound. The saddest part was that they said that her big sister who died in 2005 came to bring her home. This family has had to endure losing 2 children. 2 children!!! That thought baffles my mind. I know that it happens and it's not fair, but in lieu of that it makes me really grateful for what I DO have. I have so much to be grateful for. I have such an amazing family. My sweet husband and Corbin are my whole world and without them I would be lost. They are the reason I get up everyday...that and the knowledge of the plan of salvation and that every single day is one day closer to being with my little Jackie. But I am so grateful. The Lord has truly blessed me. I see His hand in my life daily.
I am still in awe at the amount of love that we continually feel from all of you. You have helped to ease this awful burden we carry every day. You have lifted our spirits and done so much for us that you will never know just how much you all mean to us. We love you and hope that you will know that we have noticed every single, selfless thing that you all have done to help our family. My mom still comes over almost every day, people still drop in just let us know that they are still thinking of us and keeping us in their prayers. My mom, Joanne, Sommer, Whitney, Camille, Tiana, Lanae, Mandie, Jen, Caralee, (the list can go on and on....) won't leave me alone! :) They call and call and call...so I'm sure they think I'm screening their calls! Not that I would ever want to. Bare with me...I'm trying harder. I love that you call me and drop in. It means the world to me! Thank you for being so Christlike, especially at this time of the year. Looking at the tree reminds me of Jack and it reminds me of all the love we feel so fully from every single one of you. I'd love to start name dropping (more than I already have) and could go on and on about each one of you and the things each of you have done to help in this process. You'll never know just how much it has touched our hearts and helped us feel the true light of Christ..."Through the eyes of love." I don't think there could be a more fitting name for the tree.
This year Coby's mom put together and organized a tree for Jackie to be displayed at the Festival of Trees. Until this year, I really had no idea what the "festival of trees" was. I actually thought it was a bunch of lit up trees at Thankgiving Point. We decided on a theme..."Through the eyes of love." And went with the colors of bronzes to silvers with accents of this gorgeous teal color to go with Jackie's eyes. We wanted to put things on the tree that represented things loved by our Jackie. He LOVED and I MEAN LOVED playing with balls of sorts. We thought about putting little plungers on it, but they were too hard to come by...and honestly...who really wants to boast about their child having a love for playing in a germ invested toilet??!! Joanne and the queen of crafts and cooking really, cute Amber Sargent found wooden basketballs, baseballs, soccer balls and all the Rich, Patterson and Burton (my side) along with my cute Camille came and helped paint the balls, reindeer, snowflakes, hearts and bronze stars. My aunt Linda sent some beautiful garland with Jack's name and 3 teal snowflakes. Our cute neighbor Aprill gave us two stunning ornaments to be placed on the tree. My sweet friend Amy all the way in WA helped out too. A few of the cute girls in our ward gave us a cash donation to help in the ornaments for the tree. Then Coby's family kindly purchased the tree for Coby and I to keep.
While we were there, I couldn't help but be overwhelmed with the amount of love I felt at the Festival of Trees. I watched people as they looked at our tree and read Jack's story and saw how their hearts would just break as they looked at his big blue eyes and beautiful little angelic face. I heard one lady say..."Oh, that little guy was a cutie...oh, it's just so sad...." I lost it and had to walk away because I thought...he was a little cutie...a little cutie who should still be here. I know deep down that he really shouldn't though. Then of course I go on to look at all of the other "children's" trees and read their stories. I came across one that especially broke my heart. A little girl died on her 7 month birthday....but that wasn't the saddest part...hard as that may sound. The saddest part was that they said that her big sister who died in 2005 came to bring her home. This family has had to endure losing 2 children. 2 children!!! That thought baffles my mind. I know that it happens and it's not fair, but in lieu of that it makes me really grateful for what I DO have. I have so much to be grateful for. I have such an amazing family. My sweet husband and Corbin are my whole world and without them I would be lost. They are the reason I get up everyday...that and the knowledge of the plan of salvation and that every single day is one day closer to being with my little Jackie. But I am so grateful. The Lord has truly blessed me. I see His hand in my life daily.
I am still in awe at the amount of love that we continually feel from all of you. You have helped to ease this awful burden we carry every day. You have lifted our spirits and done so much for us that you will never know just how much you all mean to us. We love you and hope that you will know that we have noticed every single, selfless thing that you all have done to help our family. My mom still comes over almost every day, people still drop in just let us know that they are still thinking of us and keeping us in their prayers. My mom, Joanne, Sommer, Whitney, Camille, Tiana, Lanae, Mandie, Jen, Caralee, (the list can go on and on....) won't leave me alone! :) They call and call and call...so I'm sure they think I'm screening their calls! Not that I would ever want to. Bare with me...I'm trying harder. I love that you call me and drop in. It means the world to me! Thank you for being so Christlike, especially at this time of the year. Looking at the tree reminds me of Jack and it reminds me of all the love we feel so fully from every single one of you. I'd love to start name dropping (more than I already have) and could go on and on about each one of you and the things each of you have done to help in this process. You'll never know just how much it has touched our hearts and helped us feel the true light of Christ..."Through the eyes of love." I don't think there could be a more fitting name for the tree.
16 comments:
I love it. It's beautiful. And your loser friend Amy up in Washington totally didn't help out at all because the ornament she purchased would not have looked very pretty on that gorgeous tree. Although, I was still plungin' for a plunger! Ha.(Sending that ornament out on Tues. btw)
(oh heck yes, I am the first comment. Woo hoo. me = loser blog stalker)
There are so many things to be grateful for right now, especially at this time of year. But it's okay to hurt as well. I guess sometimes it's a blessing just to get out of bed and carry on. You are such an example of strength and faith. When it's too much to bear, just think about Jack cheering his momma on from the other side. XOXO.
A beautiful tree for a beautiful boy! A plunger would have been great though - what is it with those things anyway??? Why are they so enticing? We love you and pray continually for comfort and peace to stay with your little family.
Hey Tiff,
I already told Coby this, but we went to the Festival of Trees just before the old ward Christmas party. I didn't know that you had done a tree~we turned the corner and Kevin said "Look, it's Jack!" and I (of course) lost it.
The tree was beautiful~one of my favorites.
Best part was being able to see you guys right after (even though we didn't get to chat much!). We love you and can't wait to see you again in a few weeks!
It is a beautiful tree. I love it.
Gavin's mom
Michelle
What a beautiful Tree! How special to participate in memory of your Christmas Star, little Jackie. I pray this Christmas, you and your family are filled with lots of wonderful memories. He is your Christmas star, shining down on you, leading and guiding the way.
Tiffany, what a beautiful, beautiful tree, and what a wonderful way to both honor Jack and to share beauty with others.
There is a lovely young woman in our ward who is struggling with the emotions and challenges of a stillborn first daughter. The following website was linked into her blog, and I'm passing it on to you because it also is touching and beautiful and may be an additional special way to remember your son.
http://www.namesinthesand.net/
May the peace and love of Christ fill your home and warm your family this Christmas season.
Lisa Gottlieb-Kinnaird
What a labor of love- it's beautiful :) I'm so glad you get to take it home.
It was by far the best tree there! Thanks for letting me be a part of it. At the Festival, I loved standing there and hearing all the comments about beautiful Jack as people walked by and looked at his picture.
...And I'll continue to not leave you alone! All my love!
Jack's tree was my fave...but I coulnd't stand there long I still haven't invested in the waterproof mascara!
The Tree is so beautiful. What a great thing to have year after year. Atleast Jack gets to be with Jesus on his birthday!!!Do they have birthday parties in heaven?
He is beautiful; I know you miss him every minute of the day. I'm so proud of you for finding the good in everything and you inspire all of us.
I can't imagine losing one, let alone 2 children. I can't imagine how the pioneers did it - I really can't fathom it. Tiff, I love you and I'm so grateful that I know you. You're a special girl and I know Heavenly Father smiles upon you and loves you so very much.
See you soon.
Hugs,
Little
I wasn't able to go to the Festival this year, but I heard about it from Camille. It was a beautiful tree for a beautful little boy. My thoughts are with you and your family.
We always try to go to the Festival of Trees, even though my contacts are a blurr before we make it out of there. But this year it was even more emotional and meaningful because of your beautiful blue-eyed angel. How could you not miss him every sec of the day? Neal A Maxwell said in a quote about Heaven...Like Alma, we will "long to be there" (Alma 36:22) in the royal courts on high." It is the only destination that really matters. Replendant reunion awaits us! What is more reasonable and more wonderful than children going home? Especially to a home where ther past, the present, and the future form an everlasting and eternal now." It is too bad that our timetable is so different from the timetable Heaven. I'm sure your little Jackie is just as anxious to be with you as you are with him. But at least his longing for you and his family is but a moment compared to yours which probably seems like an eternity without him. I'm so sorry Tiff, I know there are no words to console you, but I admire your strenghth and your example so much. Love, Amy
Tiffany,
So beautiful. So perfect. There is so much love in humanity. There really is. Even when you watch the news and it doesn't seem like it. The tree is perfect. You are beautiful.
Are you coming on Friday night???? I really would love to see you again!
I am a stranger:) but have been reading your blog for a little while, and first am so sorry about your loss. My family and I went to festival of trees and I came upon your beautiful tree. I stopped and said a little prayer in my heart for you and your family! What a beautiful little boy!!! and ps I'm glad you get to have the tree:)
It was so so fun to come and get to know you better. The tree is beautiful! Lots of love during the holidays.
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